1 Month update

Well instead if outlining my daily trials and tribulations I figured I was at the point where I can start to update the blog on a weekly basis. Things are hopefully taking a turn toward normalcy, but I still think that it may still be a little while until I'm feeling completely myself.

This week was the first week that I was physically back in the office. My work has been great about being flexible. I know that lunches were still gonna be a crapshoot with my stomach issues, so they allowed me to work remote in the afternoons. It was actually good to be back in the office. It kept my mind active and distracted from things. Also, I had wonderful support from long time friends in the office. I have one co worker who I've known since I pretty much started work many years ago who has offered up great advice relating to her own experiences with surgery. If anything it was therapeutic. But everything she said made perfect sense. Basically that no matter what kind of surgery it is, it's still a major surgery. It's something that your body has to recover from. We tend to live in a "want it now" society, and I guess that's the mindset I had coming into the surgery. But the fact of the matter is that I have to give my body some time to heal. She also mentioned how much random stuff happens to the body when it's trying to adjust. So maybe Im not going completely crazy.

As for the ankle, it has gotten progressively better each day. It's still pretty sore, but feels stronger. Couple if things I'm noticing. So at the 4 week mark, it's still pretty numb in places. Primarily on top of the foot closer to the ankle. Also tapping the right side incision still causes the nerve to shoot weird electrical stimulation through the foot. It's not painful until I accidentally hit it hard, but just a weird sensation. The redness below the incisions has gone waaaay down, and the scabs have finally come off. The one thing is that I'm still not sure if it has fixed my original problem. It's still early, but I feel soreness in that same area. I'm guessing its mostly due to the surgery, so I'll give it a chance to heal.

2 Weeks

3 Weeks

4 Weeks

It has gotten a lot stronger. I've begun to increase my workouts...while at first I was a little hesitant on the elliptical, I've now expanded it to 30 minute sessions, instead if 3 minutes. Because if the nerve, the foot tends to get pins and needles after my sessions. It's not debilitating or anything, just annoying. The other thing I've done the last couple of days is started to mix in some runs on the treadmill. The ankle is still not ready for prime time, but since the treadmill surface is still light, I've been giving it a go. I've only maxed out at 1 mile, but considering I'm only 4 weeks out if surgery, I'll take it.

As for my other issues, I'm still having patchy sleep. Per surgery I was going to bed a 1 am and waking up at 8, these days I'm trying to get ahead of the sleep and have been going to bed at 10 pm and waking up at 5 or 6. Unfortunately I'm not asleep for that duration. Usually I woulda fall asleep by about 11pm and then I ALWAYS wake up st 2:30am. I just can't get that blasted hour out if my system. Then depending in what my body wants to do it'll either wake up every hour on the hour, or just random give me times to sleep. I think Im averaging around 5 to 6 hours a night of patchy sleep. But I guess it's better than the 3 that I was getting before.

My stomach is still a bit on the tweaky side. I've been starting to increase my food intake, bit by bit. At this point I'm not sure if it's acid or trapped gas, but I do know that I can't eat anywhere as much as I did before without my stomach feeling like I just hit a local chinese buffet. It's a little difficult considering I want to increase m workouts, but am only able to take in about 1000 calories a day. Yesterday I was able to up it a bit, but still not anywhere near normal. At least I've been able to get off the soup and crackers diet. Just have to eat slower, smaller bites and many more times throughout the day. I'm hoping that I'm getting better versus the fact that I'm just on Prilosec. I've got only 5 or so more doses, so hopefully when i stop it I'll continue to improve. Who knows? Maybe my stomach shrank after the surgery?

The one thing that still kind if bugs me is that I am still getting some of those anxiety feelings. They arent as plentiful as before, but still feels weird when it happens. They tend to show up as either shortness if breath or a weird twitch in my chest. I'm scheduled to have a stress test done in two weeks just for peace of mind. Lately it's only been happening while I'm exercising, so it'll be a good test to have done nonetheless. It may still be stomach as well.

Well that's pretty much my update for the week. Next week I'll be going into the office full time, so hopefully it'll be a good distraction for me...and hopefully my stomach will hold out through lunch time! Gotta just keep in mind that everyday is jut a little better and just to have a little patience.

3 week update

So I've been blogging about this for 3 weeks now. It's been a roller coaster ride. I figured I'd give an overall update of where everything is at. The ankle itself is actually doing pretty well. I'm not ready for any races yet, but at the 3 weeks mark, I've been able to get on the elliptical almost every day since the cast came off. I was also able to get on the treadmill for a teeny bit. I was also able to do a slow jog on the treadmill this week..I think it was 5 days post cast. I'd say e ankle isn't ready for prime time yet. It's still sore when Im on the treadmill and even more sore if I try to push off. I guess I just have to be a little patient.

As for the rest of me, I think my body is still trying to heal from the surgery. I still don't know whether my issue is due to the ultra conservative recovery plan that the surgeon gave me...or someone that has to do with the stress of just having surgery. I might have actually been ok had I not been put in he cast for 2 weeks. That led to the pain, which led to the stress and insomnia (and painkillers) which I think eventually just messed things up for me. So now 3 weeks post op I'm still trying to figure out what is going on.

I know for a fact that part of my problem had to do with anxiety. Some of the issues that my pal had described about his anxiety were exactly the things that I had experienced. Luckily for the most part, those issues have seemed to dissipate. The thing at I still can't quite get away from is if something else is still going on. I'm just not sure if that's still the remnants of the anxiety speaking. I'm hoping that it's just a very slow healing process and will eventually just get better until I'm back to my normal self. I've had moments of being myself and in the last few days it seems those moments have been longer and longer. But then the low and scary moments are still there and are just enough to keep me from being totally happy still. I guess we'll see what the future holds.

So sorry if this blog turned into something completely off the mission agenda of the ankle arthroscopy experience. Perhaps it could used for some psych 101 class.

Anyways. As things progress I'll post updates. As for the day to day,

2 Weeks + 7 Days

After yesterday's pretty rough evening, I decided to take it easy, both on the ankle and the eating.  While it seemed like I had a decent total number of sleep hours, it seemed pretty restless.  I'd guess partially the stomach with the added stress on top.  I know that I woke up a couple of times in the night feeling uncomfortable...but I did get to bed semi-early and didn't get up for about 7 hours.  Just choppy.

Anyways, I got up and instantly called the to get one of my tests scheduled for the day.  This was the ultrasound to check my gallbladder.  I was able to get an appointment for 1pm.  Part of the requirement for this was to fast for 8 hours...luckily, I hadn't eaten since 3pm the day before.  Unluckily, since the appointment wasn't until 1pm, I would have to fast for another 5 more hours before eating, which would put me at about 23 hours of no food.  I was actually ok with that, since I was still tight-chested and had zero appetite.

I worked from home for the first half of the day, and then had Becky drop me off at the hospital to get the test.  I was taken in right away, and it was a fairly simple test.  It was basically the same ultrasound that a woman gets when they're pregnant...except, of course, it was around the upper-right abdomen.  I got to see the inside of my gallbladder, but sadly they didn't tell me it's gender.

The test took about 30 minutes, when my mom picked me up from the hospital.  She had brought soup and cracker for me to eat.  At this point I had started to get hungry, and decided to munch on the cracker...I slowly ate the first one, waiting for the tightness to start.  Nothing happened, so I started eating the 2nd....and then 3rd...and then as soon as I knew it, I was down 20 crackers.  There was a little tightness that had started, but I got home and tried to counteract it with some TUMS. 

I then ate some chicken rice soup...and then continued my work day.  It started getting a little tighter throughout the day...it wasn't as bad as the night before, but still felt uncomfortable.

A couple of things happened today...I got a call from one of my friends, asking how I was doing.  I told him my story about the anxiety and all the problems that I had been having.  He actually had relayed almost the exact same experiences that have happened to him...everything from the anxiety to an ulcer that he got a few years ago.  It was crazy to hear him describe something that I thought I was crazy having the last 2 weeks.  Talking to him was amazingly therapeutic.  He told me it gets better, and then gave me some tips for dealing with the stomach issues. 

Now I'm not sure if I definitely have an ulcer or an irritated stomach...but the symptoms sounded very similar.  He described it as feeling like you have a bubble in your stomach, and you instantly feel a tightness in your chest, right below your sternum.  Antacids help, but not completely.  One of the biggest reasons for this to happen is the use of NSAIDs, like aspirin or advil.  I haven't taken that much but perhaps because my body isn't used to it, it could have at least caused irritation in my stomach.  The other thing is that for a while there I was drinking a ton of orange juice, which didn't help...and of course the stress.  This kind of put my mind a little more at ease...while even though I don't know exactly what's wrong with me, it would be nice to have something as common as an ulcer.  I guess time will tell if my body responds to the prilosec.

The other thing that happened today was that I decided to drive for the first time since my surgery.  I just wanted to get out of the house, and considering I was able to "run" on the treadmill, I figured I could handle a simple dorsiflexion to drive.  I only just drove up to the local CVS and bought some anti-gas medication.  I wasn't sure if that would help, but it gave me a purpose.

So I got home, ate some chicken-rice soup, crackers, and then 3 chicken nuggets, with a pre and post meal of TUMS...The stomach kind of settled down and I went to bed around 10.

The stomach actually settled down enough for me to get some decent sleep.  I slept for a total of 7.5 hours which is the most I've had since the surgery.  I did wake up, but only woke up around 12:30 and then 2:30.  So, even though it was slightly patchy, it was good enough for me to wake up semi-refreshed.

2 Weeks + Day 6

Ankle Update
Well, Day 6 was kind of a mixed day.  I got up early and did the elliptical for .25 miles.  Ankle felt really good.  I still have numbness right around where the top of the foot meets my ankle.  It's not too noticeable unless something is touching it.  Then I can feel the pressure, but not really feel the touch itself, if that makes any sense whatsoever.  Again, just refer back to getting a novocaine shot at the dentist, and that's exactly the feel of it.  It's definitely not as annoying as having your mouth numb, though!

One other interesting thing that I was able to pull off this morning, is that I was actually able to run on the treadmill!  The ankle felt a little sore, but the treadmill seems to lessen the shock on it.  I think most of the soreness of running comes with an overstretching of the muscles in the ankle.  The calf actually feels decent, but I feel like I lost a lot of range of motion with the ankle.  So, the treadmill work seems like it'll help (along with all my PT exercises).  I only ran a quarter mile, and set it to 4.3, which is pretty much a 14:00/mile pace.  Not quite where I was...but I'll take it.  I think the cardio is gonna be harder to build than the actual muscle.

Other Issues Update
My stomach/chest was a little tight in the morning.  I'm not sure if working out would make it worse or better, but I figured I'd give it a shot, nonetheless.  It basically didn't do much.  I started work around 7am again, which is crazy early.  I had my doctor's appointment at 9:45 to get whatever this thing is checked out.  Because, Becky was working, my parents yet again picked me up and drove me there.

I explained to the doc all the events that have transpired since the "incident" 10 days post op.   I told her that lately, I'm just feeling tightness in my chest primarily after I eat.  She asked about my history, my parents history and even grandparent's history.  Of course, my parents and grandparents all have some form of heart issues or high blood pressure.  She did the procedural checkup, where I would breathe in and out with her listening through the stethoscope.  Then they did another ECG on me and compared it to the results from when I went into the ER. She found that my mom had to have her gallbladder removed, so she ordered an ultrasound as well as a stress test for me.

The other thing she mentioned that it could be some inflammation in the stomach lining, or acid reflux.  She gave me a course of Prilosec, which is used to inhibit the production of acid in the stomach.  I hadn't eaten anything since the night before, so we went out to eat afterwards.  I just had a plain hamburger from McDonald's and a Hi-C.

This actually turned out to be a mistake.  I got home and instantly felt the tightness in my chest.  I waited 2 hours and then tried to eat some chicken-rice soup that my parents brought me.  My chest just kept getting tighter...I should have stopped, but I was eating such small portions, I didn't think it mattered.  My last attempt at eating was just a single slice of bread with some jam.  I think that was at 3pm.  Then the discomfort really started to kick in.  I couldn't even think about eating anymore the rest of the day.  It was almost unbearable.  I forced myself to take the Tums, as the Prilosec is a slow-releasing preventative medicine.

I went to bed pretty miserable, but managed to make it through the night.

2 Weeks + 5 Days - Back to work

Well, I got up around 7am after lying in bed for a little while.  The top of my foot was still a little numb and tingly.  I can still feel some pressure when I scratch, but when I sort of rub my fingers on the top of the foot, it gets that same weird sensation that you get when your mouth is numb from novocaine.  The area doesn't seem to be as large as it was before, but it's much more noticeable closer to the base of the ankle.

As for the stomach, I woke up feeling that same kind of "bloated" feeling...but a lot better than the night before.  Before logging into work, I decided to do a bit of elliptical work.  This time I went for quarter mile, instead of just by time.  It took only about a minute longer.  So far, so good.  I maybe felt a slight pang of breathlessness, but it went away quickly. 

Afterwards, I logged into work, and I'll have to say that it was a pretty good feeling of normalcy.  It was a good distraction, and it helped by the fact that I was feeling a little bit better.  I ate some watermelons for breakfast.  Then for lunch I ate some rice and some leftover broccoli.  I'd say it was about a medium portion.  I felt a little tight right after eating, but it wasn't too bad or distracting from work.  I also cut a bit of a papaya fruit and tried to eat some of that as well. This tightness is interesting...there definitely seems to

The good news about getting up and starting work early, I got to get off the clock early as well.  This time, I tried to take a nap, but of course, my body would have none of that.  Instead, I just got up and watched some tv.  I ate dinner around 6pm...The chest/stomach was getting a little more tight, so I decided to eat light.  I just had some Ramen noodles, going college old-school.  The tightness just increased more.   I felt it when I tried to settle and sit down.  It took a few hours, but eventually got to the point where I was a little more comfortable sitting.

I went to bed early again, around 10pm.  This time I fell asleep around 11 and stayed asleep 'til 2:30am.  This was actually the longest amount that I've slept straight through in a while.  I went back to sleep 'til 3:30 and then again 'til 6am.  So patchy 7 hours of sleep...but it was decently restful.

2 weeks + 4 Days

Well, last night was just restless.  This morning I got up at 6:50am to a stomach ache.  After using the facilities, I couldn't really get back to sleep.  I just laid in bed for a few hours until maybe around 10am.  I don't think I actually got any real sleep in.  I was feeling some pretty crazy, tightness from the night before.  Definitely think I need an appointment with my primary care physician.

The ankle felt pretty fine.  I can definitely tell that the stiffness is starting to subside.  The one thing I do notice is that the incision areas are still on the swollen side.  The swelling has gone down a bit, but not anywhere close to where my good ankle is at.  On another positive note, the redness around the incisions has gone down to a slight pinkness.  It's definitely not as dark as it was before and the reds are now just barely noticeable.  One thing that I'm noticing is that the skin that was underneath the cast is starting to flake a little bit more.  I think it might be something that requires some lotion.

My parents, again, picked me up today.  This time we went downtown for some food.  Unfortunately, the tightness was still there, I was dragging and I didn't have very much appetite.  While we were downtown, we saw my aunt and uncle come into the same restaurant, so decided to just sit together.  This was good, 'cuz my Aunt is a doctor and I could grill her on all my questions.  She said that it's probably just the anesthesia or indigestion.  I only had a bowl of soup in front of me, and I was barely even picking at that.  I was noticeable miserable and untalkative.  She said to try some antacid pills when I eat.  My uncle actually had some on hand.  I figured, what the heck, it couldn't hurt.  So I popped two tums...the weird thing is that I started to actually feel some relief.  My appetite kind of came back and I started feeling a bit better.  I think it probably just resolved part of my problems, but it was good to feel a little human again.

We then hit a few grocery stores to prepare for my impending workday tomorrow.  I just got some quick, light meals that I could put together during the workday.  If it is my stomach that's causing some of my issues, I figure that I would start lightening up my meals a bit to see if that makes a difference.  We basically just got some yogurt, juices, bread and things of that nature.

Afterwards, my parents dropped me off back and my place.  I was thinking about a nap, but then had the opportunity to have some of my closest friends come and visit.  I wasn't gonna pass that up, and I knew that I probably woudn't fall asleep anyways.   It was seriously therapeutic.   They got me out of the house again, and helped me walk Kodo around the block...then we just sat outside for a couple of hours and chatted.  I could feel the "pangs" while we were talking...but they actually had eventually faded.  It was a nice distraction, and really just to have the company.  They had left, right before Becky got home, so I had a pretty constant stream of socialization.

I decided to eat lightly this time.  I ate a little before my friends stopped by, and then I expanded the meal when becky got home.  I took 2 tums before I ate, and decided to keep myself standing up.  The badness always happened while I was sitting and eating.  Surprisingly enough, even after about an hour, it didn't really hit...maybe a little tightness, but no the full blown "attack".

Before it had the chance to actually hit me, I decided not to tempt fate and decided to head to bed.  It was only 10 pm, but I was already wiped from all of today's activities.  I stayed up just long enough to watch the last bit of the Miami/Boston game and then went right to sleep.  I think the last i saw the clock was around 11:30pm.  I woke up around 2:30, which was decent, considering it was about 3 hours straight of sleep.  Then fell asleep and woke up again around 4am.  I turned my head and tried to fall asleep.  After a little while, I turned to look at the clock and it was 6...I just couldn't tell if I had actually slept or if I had just laid there for 2 hours.  ohwell, I guess no major attacks overnight was a good thing.  We'll see what tomorrow brings.

2 Weeks + 3 Days - Best parents ever

So after that miserable night, I woke up feeling a little more refreshed.  I tried to stay in bed as long as I could.  I eventually got up around 10am and called my parents.  They were planning on picking me up and taking me out to lunch today.  At this point, if it's anxiety, then any out time is a blessing.

Ankle actually felt good getting out of bed this morning.  No stings that I can remember.  I was able to start walking right out of bed.  Not too shabby for 3 days out of the cast.

I got up, did some elliptical work again for a little over 2 minutes.  I took a shower and then called my parents. My parents drove the distance to pick me up, and then we went out to Red Robin for some food.  Afterwards, we just went from store to store around the mall area and browsed around for the next 3 hours.  I wore my walking boot most of the time and walked myself.  When my ankle finally started to get tired (i.e. I started feeling some stings) I switched to wearing my shoe and sock, and then just crutched around.  We capped the day at DQ for some ice cream and headed back home.

We got home around 5pm... the ankle felt decent again, so mom and I decided to take Kodo for a walk.  Well, mom held Kodo while I crutched/hobbled around.  It wasn't actually too back.  I walked some of it, but then decided to crutch whenever I felt any twinges.  Kodo, got tired first as he usually does and it started to rain, so we just called the walk short.

It was a wonderful day out, and I didn't feel any issues throughout.  I thanked my parents profusely as they looked pretty tired too.  They went back home.

I tried to take a nap, but could only toss and turn...so instead, I did a bit of laundry and opened all the windows just to aerate the house.  I sat on the patio outside with the pup and just played a couple of games on the iPad.  Then I ended up eating around 8:30pm.  I had a sneaking suspicion that somehow that my eating is somehow related to my shortness of breath.  Sure enough, just around 9pm, I felt my first "pang" of the day.  What a bummer, since it was such a great day.

The tightness got worse and worse, and I think as it gets tight, my anxiety rises more and more.  By 10:00pm I was pretty wiped from the day, and decided to try to get some sleep.  I lied in bed for about an hour and probably was pretty restless until finally falling asleep around 11.  It was restless sleep.  I remember waking up a bunch of times, but then being for a bit longer and then waking up around 2:30am.  I just turned and fell asleep again, and I think I saw 4:00, and then 6:50am.